It is an unfortunate truth that when you go beyond the conditioning of the world that you can feel less, rather than more powerful. Prior to that, you fully believed in 3D mechanisms and machinations, and therefore it appeared easier to determine how you were going to live your life.
Spiritual growth is a process of stripping away what you think you know. It is about letting go of ideas, identities and beliefs that limit you to 3D perceptions. Whereas before you could set goals, visualise and create outcomes with greater ease, as you deepened on your path this became harder to do.
Something was calling to you and making itself known. That something is what many call the soul. When the soul awakens and calls to you, and you do not listen, then life can feel very hard. It’s almost as if it is saying: ‘you’ve had your time, now it’s my time.’
This response is not made out of a desire to be churlish or petulant, it is a reminder that this time around you decided to go beyond what was easily identifiable in the physical or material realm.
Each one of us has our own journey and such is the nature of the spiritual path, that there is no one rule fits all scenario. And yet, there are trends and patterns and familiar outcomes. This aspect of feeling in less control of your life as you deepen on your path is one of those patterns.
The difficult stage of awakening.
When you arrive at a certain stage in your awakening, things that seemed easy to create or manifest, now feel like hard work. This tends to happen if what you’re trying to create doesn’t go far enough in its intention or isn’t broad enough in its scope.
If you’re trying to live in a particular way, one that feels pleasant to you but does not serve what the soul wishes to experience, then you’ll know. The soul’s basic premise is: How can you know who you are until you discover who you are not? And what’s the best way to discover who you’re not? By having the things you think you know for certain, now start to feel extremely uncertain.
So, before you may have been pursuing that job, that income bracket, that house, that woman or man. You had a desire to live an easy life. You needed to see yourself progressing on a linear path that was measurable and made sense to you. You spend your life working towards these things. But out of the blue comes some huge event that takes your life off course.
That huge event could be an illness, a sudden deep depression, relationship breakdowns, a job loss or some other phenomena that you felt you had no control over. This is the paradox, these events are more likely to happen if you are meant to change the direction of your life in a significant way, or if your thinking is too small. It is also more likely to happen if you are someone who asks big questions of life.
Questions such as:
- Who said this is so?
- How did this come to be?
- Why are we on this planet?
- What is the purpose of life?
- Are the rules of my society the best rules to live by?
If you’re not the questioning type, it is less likely that you will experience such major changes. You can go on your own merry way, pretending that more money, a bigger house or a nicer car will fulfil you.
Yet even the non-questioning types will see their lives begin to feel deeply uncertain at some point. But that uncertainty will arise because of a change of government policy, or losing privileges they’ve long accepted as their right. As mentioned before, nothing is ever written in stone. These are just some of the patterns and trends that cause us to wake up out of our miasmas.
Back to those big questions.
When you ask these types of questions, they require an answer. How they get answered is by causing you to question everything you’ve been told. It also causes you to look at everything you think you knew about yourself.
What better way to shake you up than everything you think you know no longer making sense? Or everything you’ve been told to believe now seeming like nothing but being programmed and conditioned in a particular way? That will certainly pull the rug out from under your certainty.
This is how a soul-call works. Once it is activated through these big questions, it will point you towards the answers to those questions. It will also start revealing what will be most fulfilling to you ultimately. What fulfils you may not be what you thought at all! Hence the feeling that you’re no longer in charge.
The soul will enjoy reminding you that you were never really in charge in the first place. That you are a construct, made up of beliefs and conditioned from the moment you entered this world.
You’re a construct of the world you live in.
You were given a name. You were assigned to a racial category. You were told what gender you were and how that gender should act. Your country of origin had its own rules that it required you to follow. Religious beliefs were either imposed upon you or decried for their ridiculousness, depending on which type of household you grew up in.
This person you call you, was a product of all of this programming. Now that programming is coming undone in search of what’s actually true. And when that undoing happens, you will feel that you know very little about anything for a while.
The only thing you will be certain of is that your life will never be the same. You may come to an understanding that despite this, all is well. You’ll see that your soul-call isn’t disrupting your life simply out of a desire for mischief and entertainment. No, it is leading you towards your true self and your authentic expression in this world. That direction is one that has been calling since the day you were born. Yet it is only now that you’re able to tune in and pay heed.
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This article was previously published at the Good Men Project